Dating someone on the rebound can be fun, but it’s not for everybody. You need to be in touch with your emotions and manage expectations. If not, chances are you might miss completely the signs you are the rebound.

What are the signs you are in a rebound relationship?

1. There’s No Spark

2. All The Signs Of Progress Without The Feelings

3. The Looming Ex

4. They Jump In Headfirst

5. They’re Hot Then They’re Cold

6. They’re Insecure

7. It’s Just Too Soon

8. The Endless Comparisons

9. There’s A Pattern Emerging

10. They Don’t Compliment You

11. You Two Have History

12. You Have To Help Them Heal

You ever been good friends with someone, and things change overnight?

Maybe you had been strictly platonic, but now she’s asking you to come over and watch some Netflix on a Saturday night?

Next thing you know, things get hot n' heavy…

You’re pumped because you’ve always thought she was hot! What changed her mind? Why the sudden interest?

Then you find out she recently broke up with her boyfriend. Odds are you go with the flow…

You’ve always had a secret crush, and you think this is your chance. What could go wrong?

Unfortunately, a lot of time is wasted every year by people who know they are a rebound fling, but choose to wait it out.

They hope that he or she will eventually get over their ex and see them for who they really are.

They’ll fall in love and live happily ever after.

The problem is that never happens…

All rebound flings are destined to fail. It’s just a matter of whether both sides know it and accept the unspoken rebound agreement.

Often, people fail to recognize that they’re the rebound fling. They’re overcome with the whirlwind romance that comes on fast and furious.

It’s flattering to be so sought after and desired. A lot of times, someone rebounding comes at you so fast, it’s flattering. After all, people love to be loved.

Challenges arise as the passion settles in and cracks start to appear…

It all becomes clear that the reason they’re with you is that they’re using you to get over somebody else.

Read these 12 signs to see whether you're the rebound and if you’re being played:

2 couple with no spark

1. There’s No Spark

Have you ever dated someone, and you just can put your finger on why they’re with you?

I mean, we all want to punch above our weight and snag someone out of our league, but sometimes relationships plain don’t make sense.

She never laughs at your jokes, or let’s be honest, she barely even makes eye contact with you.

You don’t have anything in common, and you have a hard time keeping the conversation flowing. Basically, there’s no spark…

Lack of spark is the most common signs you’re the rebound.

If there’s no chemistry, it’s a good bet there’s some other motive your partner has for being with you, and it isn’t love.

Some people are so addicted to being with someone that they’ll latch on to the closest thing after a breakup.

All you needed to do was be a warm body in the vicinity. If we’re honest with ourselves, we’ll admit there’s no future in a relationship without the spark.

3 couple not seeing eye to eye

2. All The Signs Of Progress Without The Feelings

When there’s no spark, you’d expect things to die down quickly. However, that’s not the case with rebound flings.

Rebounds keep moving forward without the foundation that’s necessary for a healthy relationship. Without a spark, the commitment feels empty.

She changes her Facebook relationship status in the first week, asks to move in together after a couple months, and wants to meet your parents…

It all feels a little surreal…

Here you are wondering why you’re together and if there’s something there, and your partner seems like they’re plowing ahead toward marriage.

If the relationship is moving forward, but there’s lingering doubt about the feelings there, trust your gut.

You’re probably in an unstable situation where they’re rebounding hard.

4 signs you are the rebound jealous ex boyfriend

3. The Looming Ex

This one’s easy, but some people still don’t get it.

They overlook their partner talking about his or her ex all the time because they want the relationship to work so badly.

I get it, a few honorable mentions about the ex and what went well or why things ended is perfectly cool.

Watch out if she or he starts bringing up the ex as a measuring stick when it comes to you. It’s one of the basic signs you’re the rebound.

Don’t let them use the ex to dictate how you operate. It’s a clear sign they’re still rebounding and aren’t ready for a new relationship.

5 hot n heavy couple

4. They Jump In Headfirst

Not everyone one is always in the mood to be come on to, but sometimes it’s nice.

You’ve got to admire the gusto of people who approach strangers or friends and risk it all to take things to the next level.

The strong come on is a red flag that you’re in rebound territory.

Now, I should clarify that there are differences between hooking up and getting sucked into a rebound relationship.

To make things happen for a hookup, people must get to the point quicker than in other environments.

People will be more direct to communicate their intentions. That’s perfectly normal.

However, the problem arises when it becomes more than a casual hookup.

When the hot n’ heavy is nonstop without that normal “feeling out” process of a new relationship, then you should start worrying.

6 dismissive girlfriend

5. They’re Hot Then They’re Cold

One of the easiest signs you’re in a rebound relationship is if your partner runs hot and cold. I'm not talking your normal mood swings, either.

People who are rebounding don’t really care about you the way you want them to.

That means they’re not well-attuned to your feelings, or the support and touch you require to be happy.

They’re in it for them, so they’ll initiate nice conversations, sex, cuddling, whatever, when they want it, not to show you love.

Pay special attention to how they treat you around old friends.

If they clam up to show their ex or their pals that you’re no big deal, then take it for what it is.

Real partners will want to flaunt new relationships because of how happy it makes them.

7 signs you are the rebound jealous ex girlfriend

6. They’re Insecure

If the person you’re dating has had their confidence crushed by a broken relationship, then consider the likely impact on the two of you.

First of all, have enough confidence in yourself to not date someone who struggles with too much insecurity.

What does that ultimately say about you if they’re willing to date you when they don’t have faith in themselves?

People with low self-confidence jumping into a relationship is one of the easiest signs you’re the rebound to spot.

Secondly, you’ll spend so much time trying to deal with their confidence issues that it will drain you…

It will eventually come back to bite you.

Men and women on the rebound need someone to feel good about themselves. They can’t stand to be alone with their thoughts and grow.

8 couple jumping in too fast

7. It’s Just Too Soon

Time is relative. There are thousands of happy couples who meet and know in an instant they should be together.

Sometimes chemistry is too undeniable. It can happen to people in otherwise committed relationships.

They’re in a class or at a bar with someone and they immediately know their lives will never be the same. People are willing to drop everything to chase true love.

However, rebound relationships have zero in common with situations like these.

Remember, in previous steps we’ve touched on how rebound relationships have all the external signs of a stable, loving relationship without the underlying spark, or feelings.

You’ll know things are happening too soon if you feel that vacuum.

Additionally, if someone’s been in a five-year committed relationship and then it ends badly, they shouldn’t be seriously dating someone the next week.

It’s a sure sign of a rebound.

9 woman on her ipad

8. The Endless Comparisons

“Why can’t you be like him?” “Why can’t you love me like her?” Everyone should be open to some critical feedback in love.

How you communicate, make love, spend your money, keep your home clean, and other subjects will all involve some level of compromise.

But no one wants to be held up to some standard that’s arbitrary in their partner’s head.

It’s an even bigger challenge when the standard is another person your partner is still in love with!

One of the clearest signs you are the rebound is repeated comparisons to the ex.

It should send a message loud and clear that they wish they were still dating their ex and not you! Take the hint and weave your way out of that situation.

10 signs you are the rebound sad girl in kitchen

9. There’s A Pattern Emerging

If they can’t remember the last time they were single, then you should probably suggest they spend some quality time alone.

Like I said, some people are addicted to being in a relationship. They struggle with codependency.

Many times, people who are in one relationship after another are doing it to avoid addressing deeper underlying issues of attachment, insecurity, or to hide some sort of past trauma.

Be careful when dating someone who has a pattern of hopping from one person to the next.

Whether it’s the last guy or gal, or the one three partners back, locking down a new relationship right after another is never a good sign.

11 couple posing on the beach

10. They Don’t Compliment You

I’ve touched on the “feeling vacuum” in other steps, but the lack of compliments is another one of the signs they’ve got you on the rebound.

People in love naturally want to build each other up. Especially during the early stages of a relationship.

You shower your partner with praise to show them how much you adore them. It’s one of the best ways to make them feel secure in the relationship.

They then feel open to expressing their feelings toward you with lovely compliments.

If she or he isn’t complimenting how you look, or they’re not eager to celebrate success at work or school, then you’re not on the pedestal you deserve to be.

It’s an indicator that you’re not the first choice, which can be devastating to learn.

The best thing you can do is address the lack of compliments up front.

Some people are less expressive than others. If asking for more compliments doesn’t work, then it may be time to move on.

12 couple in uncertain kiss

11. You Two Have History

Remember all those years you were his/her shoulder to cry on? The one you spent hours texting or calling to listen to all their love problems?

If you had feelings for them, you’re sure they wouldn’t have noticed, even if you hit them with it like a bag of bricks.

There was nothing there, you were just friends. After the breakup, though, things changed…

Suddenly, they start to get touchy feely…

They feel like they can take certain liberties with you or make a move because there’s a certain level of comfort between you both.

You might be ecstatic because it’s all you’ve ever wanted… but it’s a big red flag you’re a rebound.

They might even tell you they want to give things between you a real try, finally. People hurt by a breakup commonly run into the arms of another.

Just be sure you know the deal before you open that door up. Even if they say they’re in it for the long-term, it won’t end well.

13 couple at a coffee shop

12. You Have To Help Them Heal

It may sound crazy, but some people embrace their role in a rebound.

A lot of people have savior complexes where they seek out people who are damaged or hurt to date.

It points to their own personal challenges, and it’s not good for a long-term relationship.

It’s delusional to think that the person you want to date will recognize how supportive you are and fall in love so soon after a rough breakup.

Please, if you find yourself rubbing the back or hugging someone who is heart-broken over their ex, have some self-respect and get out of there.

They should be healing on their own, and certainly not at the expense of your mental and emotional health.


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