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Men can be funny creatures. Sometimes we can act like we're so put together around you, but when he's telegraphing signs he likes you, really everything inside us men is a *tangled mess*.
What are the signs he likes you?
1. He’ll Always Be Smiling Around You.
2. He’ll Struggle To Make Direct Eye Contact.
3. He’ll Find Things In Common Between You Two.
4. He’ll Let You Catch Him Staring.
5. He’ll Put His Hand On Your Lower Back.
6. He’ll Bite His Lower Lip.
7. He’ll Laugh At Anything Remotely You Say.
8. He’ll Proactively Set Up A Date.
In reality, we only have so much control over how we want to be read in regards to whether or not we're into you.
93% of all human communication is non-verbal. So when he gives off signs he likes you, more times than not, he doesn't even realize he's doing it.
Next time you're out with a guy, hone in on his actions and not so much his words. The beautiful thing is women are natural experts at reading body language, so this should come fairly easily to you.
Here are eight things men do, in detail, to give off signs he likes you:
1. He'll Always Be Smiling Around You
When we're feeling good about the company we're in, men typically wear their hearts on their sleeves.
There's nothing like being on a fantastic date or running into someone you've had your eye on at a party. It makes us feel on top of the world…
This is because most dates can make us feel the opposite way. Normally, we discover the vibe just isn't feeling right.
There's a certain sense of hopelessness that men and women feel alike when we don't feel attraction for the person that's in front of us.
When that spark of attraction does hit us men, it's like being on our favorite amusement park ride in our minds 24/7; we can't help but smile.
Sure, guys can fake it just to get through the night. But everyone knows a fake “polite smile” when they see one.
(And if you're unsure, people who offer a fake smile typically never show their bottom teeth.)
If you're getting a genuine smile from him, smile back! Chances are things are going very, very well in his mind.
2. He'll Struggle To Make Direct Eye Contact
We can be the most confident man in the world, but if we're attracted to you, the eye contact thing always throws a wrench into our game.
It's almost as if you're looking right into our souls and seeing just how mushy we are, and that can be a very vulnerable place for us.
I'm personally familiar with this one, because I remember asking myself on multiple occasions “Why aren't you looking at her?! Get it together, man!”
This is one of those subtle signs he likes you and may even lead you to believe he's not into you if you're not careful.
The idea here is to try find clusters of these behaviors as your overall indicator of his interest, not just one sign all by itself.
He'll probably dart his eyes up at you like a puppy dog and then look right back down if he's attract to you. If you catch him constantly looking at other attractive people in the room, however, chances are the opposite is true.
3. He'll Find Things In Common Between You Two
The first part of this involves his taking control of the conversation.
He might accidentally interject while you're describing things that you like to do. Then, he'll let you know he's into the same thing. “Oh my God, I love hiking on Saturday mornings!”
From there, you'll usually get hit with a few questions specifically about hiking: “Where do you hike? How long do you usually hike for?”
This process gets him pumped, subconsciously, about this particularly aspect of you since he also likes hiking. You might notice he'll latch onto another couple of key interests you mention and ask you questions about them to learn more about you.
Clearly, if he asks you to go hiking with him, you're golden. If we are not interested in you, we won't make the effort because we simply don't care.
4. He'll Let You Catch Him Staring
When we're attracted to you, you're like that bright, shiny thing that stands out from all other things at any given time. And chances are, (not to creep you out), we're staring at you many more times than you realize or catch us doing it.
Take it as a compliment (unless you're getting one of those creeper stares where they don't look away ever…)
5. He'll Put His Hand On Your Lower Back
There is something in our DNA that dates to way back when that tells us guys to be chivalrous, hold doors and to lead on a date.
Whatever your views may happen to be on that, I believe this is where the hand on the lower back comes from, particularly walking through entryways or if he's about to introduce you to someone.
If he touches your back, shoulder or arm, even if momentarily, these are fairly certain signs he likes you. It's risky for us to do.
Touching someone else is always risky. But it could mean there is a mutual comfort building between the two of you, as well. He simply wants to test the waters to make sure you are, in fact, comfortable with him.
6. He'll Bite His Lower Lip
This one is actually quite funny, because the way I learned about this was from women commenting to me about it when it was happening on the dates!…
(To read my story of how I went on 148 dates in one year, read my About page here)…
“You know you do this cute thing I just noticed…” Once it happened the second time, I knew it was happening subconsciously and it happened with two women I really liked.
I can isolate this one down to an indicator of interest because it's never happened around my family and I've never had one of my boys be like, “You know you do this thing with your lip…”
Just another one for you to add to the “interest checklist.”
7. He'll Laugh At Anything Remotely Funny You Say
I've definitely caught myself doing this one multiple times on dates and I'm like, “Yep – she's great.”
This can be a tricky one in the sense that sometimes people laugh just to be polite and that certainly isn't going to be helpful to you in determining a man's interest.
I'm talking about laughing that might even seem a bit excessive with a lot of smiling in between, almost to the point where you're like “Come on man!”
Frequent laughing and smiling – just two more signs he likes you.
8. He'll Proactively Set Up A Date
This one is much more obvious and goes hand-in-hand with #3 involving commonalities. If you guys spend a bit of time discussing hiking, the next logical date he's going to try to set up wouldn't be going fishing – it's going to be hiking!
He probably won't do this while on the date in which he discovered the hiking commonality, but rather mention that it would be fun and work out the details with you later.
We don't set up times to hang out unless we're interested. We don't go on dates just to be polite.
You should probably set up a date or two with him yourself just to reciprocate and let him know you'd like to see him too.
But if he's working towards a next date, no need to wonder how he feels about you.
If you'd like to know one word you can use (correctly!) to keep him hooked on you, watch my Youtube video called Why This 1 Word Will Keep Him Glued To You here.
Actions, Not Words, Show The True Signs He Likes You
Men and women put so much emphasis on words. Sure, words have importance, but it's behaviors that carry the real weight.
Try not to read into any one behavior. Rather allow all of them to paint you the whole picture of where you stand with him. No need to be some pensive detective on your dates. Have fun!! Let your instincts do the rest.
Are you ready to enroll in Ryan Patrick's video course, The Boyfriend Blueprint? If so, make sure you grab your special promo code here first…
Ryan this is gold. I was on another one of your articles and came across this one. I’m feeling slightly nervous after not seeing a new beau for 3 weeks and he does many of what you have described here particularly proactively setting up the next time we will see each other. He always does this which is helpful and reassuring when he’s been away. Thank you I’ve got that skip in my step again for the beginning of this fine day!
GOLD! Omg thank you for saying that, Fleur! You got a big smile out of me on that one 🙂
Yes, I’d say you’re in a great spot with this gentleman. Guys just don’t set up dates to be polite. He sounds like he’s leading the courtship, too, which certainly should bring some reassurance to you that things are progressing wonderfully. Keep that skip in your step comin’! Have a great day 🙂
I learned some things about myself I didn’t realize and I think your list of subconscious things guys do when they like a girl is spot on. Smiling and laughing is the greatest as you’re showing joy at being near someone. Finding commonalities and reaching out to set up a date or future encounter are definite signs of attraction and genuine interest.
Hey Alexander – thanks for letting us know of your experience with these subtle cues we give off!
Sometimes we try to mask things like smiling and laughing to cover the fact that we like a girl/woman while in their presence, but we as men never benefit in those scenarios. We should always be genuine and authentic and that cuts to the heart of what people find attractive about us in the end. Thanks for sharing 🙂
Hey Ryan,are you serious? I wish i could meet you because you seem to be a romantic creature.I know men can do whatever to have the women they like on their sides.It is wonderful to see that a man is showing a woman the signs that he is interested in her.It is wonderful for a woman to be desired by a man.
You are right in your search.
Haha, thanks Julienne! Ahhhh just a hopeless romantic indeed…lol
Yes, I had to dig deep and become verrrrrry introspective with myself to understand how I was really expressing myself with women when I was interested in them. I also made sure to confirm these behaviors by going out there in public to watch other men expressing themselves in exactly the same ways. Body language is a beautiful thing, I’m just glad I understand more of how it works now!
Thanks for posting!! -R
Once I bumped into a guy whom I haven’t met for a long time and to be honest, we weren’t close at all even during high school. More like a hi-and-bye kind of thing. We had a light chat by the store and while we crossed the road together, he actually place in hand at my waist, as if to guide. I thought that was very sweet of him, but it also felt weird because I didn’t feel any spark between us. Not sure if that was a sign or not.
Hi Cathy!
Thanks for sharing this story! Men typically don’t touch a woman unless he’s certain he’s getting signs of interest from you, but it could have been something he was brought up with in regards to the leading or “guiding” as you say. It sounds like you were having a “polite” conversation with an old schoolmate, so it was probably nothing. Maybe he saw the curb was tall and just didn’t want you to trip.
Thanks for stopping by DaterBoy! R-
Hello Ryan how are you ?, I always wanted to be able to understand men, now I am married and I think that this possibility of getting to know someone again is not going to happen. But you make me think about the signals that my husband made when we met, I do not remember that he made half of these signals but somehow we ended up together. I love reading your posts. If I ever go out with someone again, I’ll take it into account 🙂
Hi, Paola. I’m great! How about you?
It’s funny because sometimes hindsight isn’t always 20/20, especially when we retroactively try to remember how we fell in love with someone and the things that they did on their end to create that space for love. In fact, it can be darn-right maddening! Lol
Thanks for your compliments about my posts 🙂 Yes, I love bringing awareness into people’s dating lives to help them understand that we’re always receiving feedback from the other person, whether they give it to us verbally or not, so we’ll always know where we stand with someone. If we know what to look for, it’s saves our time (and our sanity!) Thanks for stopping by DaterBoy!